sunshine factory – artwork by tracey kazimir-cree

Hi everybody — Week 2 is complete!

I did some wrecking, although not as much as I would have liked. It’s been a very busy week, so I ended up forgetting the book a lot. Now I am trying to take it with me wherever I go. I think it caught a few curious looks as it sat on the conference table at my SBDC class this morning. Today at lunch, Venita recommended a book to me and I scribbled the title on the first page so as not to forget it.

I’m kinda beat from all of the learning and working I’ve been doing this week, so I’m not going to write too much more about wrecking my journal. On a whim, I vlogged instead. Whipped open Photo Booth without giving it a second thought and created the video you see here.

This is HUGE for me because I don’t want people to see me. (Let’s not even go there, ok?) There is also a video of Doug the Dog helping me wreck my journal, recorded with the video thingie on my Palm Centro. enjoy!

As I type this, I am sitting on my journal. I received this book for Christmas and have done a few of the prompts in it since then, but when I heard Jamie Ridler was leading a Wreck This Journal group, I knew it was a sign that I needed to get more invested in this book. So I am. Only problem is, I keep forgetting to do stuff. ha!

Be Brave

Last weekend, I did do some doodling in one of the pages. Easy enough. Stuff I do every day in other books. Not a big deal. I made a sign for myself.

But last night I tried to do something more daring. There is a black page that says “Lose this page. (Throw it out.) Accept the loss.” I ignored it for a while and looked for another page to work on. Then I went back and tore out the page and crumpled it up. Then I sat the wadded up ball of paper aside and freaked out a little. And I know exactly why.

I love recording things. I love complete archives and histories of events. I want to leave behind stuff that doesn’t make people wonder about Tracey. “Why did grandma tear a page out of this book?” one kid might wonder.

Lose this page

And here’s the other thing. We had barely any money growing up. I learned the value of a dollar very early on. I also learned that if I leave my stuff lying around, my little brothers would destroy it and then it would be gone and there would be no more because there was no money to buy more. So I’m very protective of my stuff.

And that’s why throwing away this page is so hard.

But I’ve done more difficult stuff in the last week. I’ve gone out of my comfort zone at least twice and both times were very rewarding. Also, things aren’t as scarce now as they were when I was nine.  So when I post this entry, I will throw away this wadded up page (in the dumpster outside!) and move on with my day.

Friday, I was juried (is that the right word?) in as an artist to the Poudre River Arts Center studios. I know that acceptance by my peers shouldn’t be a requisite, but for me, it helps remind me I am an artist. These artists are following their hearts, making a living at their art or doing art daily and they have STUDIOS in an ART CENTER with a GALLERY and that’s part of the Fort Collins First Friday thing…well, that’s way too cool.

I’ve been doing their website for a few years and now and then made some suggestions which have morphed into a position where I could be compensated for doing something I’m really good at. Long story short, they used to be more of a co-op, but now they have decided to create two positions — a marketing person and an operations person and the compensation would be studio space. I have really wanted to get out of the house more lately, as working at home can be a bit of a drag sometimes. I also want to give my art more serious attention; I thought that being in this type of atmosphere might help.

Friday afternoon I met with the artists, at the encouragement of Kat Peters-Midland, to be “interviewed” so the others could decide if I fit in with the existing studio artists. They were all really nice and seemed to like my work, although I felt very amateur and silly in their presence. (I’ll get over that, really.) An hour later, there was an email from Kat saying I’m in.

I’m very excited to have a studio, away from home, to work in. I think I’ll be more focused, as I won’t see my laptop across the room and worry about work that needs to be done, or laundry that needs to go into the dryer, etc. I’m super excited about finding a spot large enough to teach classes, as I’ve been wanting to do that for a while now and have a few workshop ideas bubbling up in the back of my head.

This coming week, i’ll go over to look at the spaces again and select mine, as well as to sign the contract. I think I move in July 1, but I’m hoping it will be a little sooner so I can participate in First Friday that month. I have so many ideas!

In the way of actual art-making, I have a few projects in progress, which I’ll write about soon. I completed a 9-month art therapy group yesterday, which also deserves a nice, thoughtful writeup. The photos in this post are from a swap I just did with Kelly and Venita. These two ladies make my heart sing. clicking on the photos will take you to larger versions, along with short explanations.

I’m playing around with a free slideshow that grabs stuff from flickr. It’s called pictobrowser. It may load a little slowly, but feel free to play with it and see what you think. Here are a bunch of photos in my Flickr that are tagged with “journaling”. enjoy!

Today my mother called me when I was slammed with work. She does that a lot. It’s ok, because she’s mom and I love her. Usually I rush her off the phone with a promise to call later (which I always do), but today I listened. She was excitedly talking about Harlan Ellison and some interview she saw on The Sundance Channel. She was really excited about it, which surprised me because mom doesn’t go in for foul or crude language or free-spirited thinkers (unless they are saints). Mom, I know you know I’m teasing you, but this is true – admit it!!

In the interview, Ellison discusses this phenomenon where writers are asked to write for free. He is appalled by this practice; insulted, even. And he’s right. Creativity is work, just like doing dishes, paving roads or being the governor. And when you work at something, it’s only right you get paid for it. (I’m still working on a solution for the stay-at-hom moms out there, but I’m puzzled on how to approach that one.)

I build websites and consult on internet stuff for a living. I can’t even count how many people have asked me to do it for less money or for free. In the beginning of my business, I did it a lot. I am not doing it any more. It’s hard, because you want that business, but by doing things for cheap or for free, you are cheapening your work and the work of your contemporaries. This is the same for all of you artists who are patiently and quietly working on softies or paintings or collages or altered art and so on. Your inspiration is of great value to the world. Think about it.

And for those who are wondering, the smudge of lime green pastel is still on the sleeve of my hoodie. Which is good, because it helps me still believe I’m an artist, because there hasn’t been much proof of that lately. Also, I can’t find my camera.

A few weeks ago, in my art therapy group (Creating Your Heart’s Desire), we did intuitive drawings on large sheets of paper hung on the wall. We used pastels, which I rarely use in my regular art. I noticed the next day that there was a smudge of lime green pastel on the sleeve of my hoodie. I was so excited and wore that smudge all day like a quiet little personal badge of honor. Unfortunately, I eventually washed the hoodie and the smudge is gone now. But today I’m wearing that hoodie again and I remember the smudge and I’m reminded: Yes, I am an artist. What a happy, freeing thought that is for me.

I have been very very busy finishing Christmas gifts (yes, really) and, more recently, valentines. I’ve also been working on the Collage Challenge with Crowabout and assorted swaps. I have so much to show, so I put a few of each type of item here (click on photos to see larger version), but there are a lot more on my Flickr site.

Mini quilts. These are fun and I’m finally getting the hang of using my machine. I’m no expert, but I like the way these are all coming out. The base fabric is stuff I painted in workshops with Lisa Englebrecht (Maybe I’ll actually finish the projects I started in Lisa’s workshops someday!) last year. The two that say “hope” are for my youngest brothers and there’s a pocket made from a Hambly overlay that holds a prayer card from our dad’s funeral, which was last year on 2/14. The card is of St. Jude, who was my dad’s favorite saint (and is my second favorite). St. Jude is the patron saint of hopeless cases (and policemen) and I thought my brothers would like a little something to remind them to have hope for whatever their dreams may be. Recently I thought that gluing pony beads on the ends of the hanging stick would finish off the look nicely and I was right! Very happy with these.

Mini quilt for my brother Steve and his wife. A belated Christmas 2008 gift!	Mini quilt for my brother Mike. A belated Christmas 2008 gift!	This was Jennie’s Christmas gift and it was less late than the ones for my family.

Collage stuff. I’ve been trying each week to find a little time to participate in the Collage Play With Crowabout challenge. Here are a few of the recent collages I’ve done using images from that challenge. If you are interested in playing along with us, email Nancy and ask for an invite. Let her know traypup sent you! I’m really enjoying art journaling lately and will be posting more pages from my journals in my next post.

Crowabout challenge week 20.	Crowabout challenge week 21.	Crowabout challenge week 22. The heads are my mom and myself about 40 years ago.

Cards. Sometimes I have a hankering to make a ton of cards. I can’t bear to buy them in the store because I feel like making them from scratch means so much more. Plus, I have all of the stuff! So I collected all of my Valentine’s Day-related supplies and sat on the sofa watching movies with my husband and made a ton of cards. Here are a few:

Vday 2009 card for Devin	Assorted Vday cards	You make my heart whirl

So that’s what I’ve been up to lately! There is lots more that I’ll be writing about this week. I’m excited to get back into the swing of things.

I don’t know if my love for office supplies has ever been properly documented. I have more pens than any person should be allowed to have. I partially blame Kelly Kilmer for this, but that’s a whole other blog entry just waiting to happen.

Today, I headed to Office Depot because I needed new printer cartridges. Office Depot had recently sent me a coupon for $25 off a purchase of $25 or more, so it seemed a no brainer. Since the coupon excluded ink, I figured I could replace a few of my dried out Pitt Pens and pick up more of the Uniball Vision Elite pens that I love so much. Who knew a gal could have so much fun in an office supply store? I am a sucker for a nice design and a new way to organize myself and my stuff. Luckily, I was able to restrain myself.

Here’s what I did buy:

• 
• Uniball Vision Elite. The tip is .05/micro. I’ve been using the bold, which I do love because they write over acrylic paint so nicely. I thought it was time to try out the fine tips. I got the pack of many colors, of course, but if I had to choose one, it would be black. I use these pens for everything. They write so nicely!
• Pink Expo Dry Erase markers. Some of the money goes to City of Hope and they are PINK, for the love of Mike. I have two dry erase boards in my studio for reminding me what to keep top of mind and as soon as I free them of other messes, I will outline my studio projects for the upcoming weekend.
• Earl Grey Sharpies. Fine and Ultra Fine. This color will be great for shading. I can’t even find it on sharpie.com, but it’s delicious. You need these pens. Also, I noticed the store has a brand new sharpie display…almost a whole side of the aisle covered with sharpies, including open stock of fine and ultra fine. It doesn’t get better than this. Don’t tell my husband.

Here’s what I didn’t buy:

• Really Useful Box. You can’t see the candylike colors of the lids online, but they are gorgeous in the store — red, pink, green, blue see through…NOM. I think I might need one for the car for all of those things that rattle around in there like the first aid kit, tissues, handiwipes, etc. They were on sale for $10, too! I can see these being really useful for storing and sorting collage papers — and toting the papers and assorted assemblage supplies to workshops. I’m going to think some more on this one.

• 

  PaperMate Flair Felt Tip Pens. Many colors all in one package. I swooned, but decided I needed to chill. I still have my recent Bic Permanent pens from my birthday money and they are delicious in their own right. Next time I need pens (next month, I hope!), it can be these Flairs. Every girl needs a little flair. And I DO like talking about my Flair.

Other than finding some lovely supplies, I have been making lots of yummy stuff, which I will be posting later this weekend, so stay tuned!

Bought this kit at Hobby Lobby for 70 cents and plan to make some more of these little guys because they amuse me. How cute is he? Pretty Darn!

I remember when I was a kid…maybe right before high school (so, late 70s), we used to make little pom poms out of yarn and give them googley eyes. My friend Wendy and I also made families of octopi with googley eyes. So making this little kit had me feeling all throwback! I ran around hobby lobby looking for bags of eyes and glittery pom poms. I also got a pile of stickers, rubons and some cheapie decorative tapes for making valentines. I’m so excited!

This coming April, we’ll have been in our house 2 years and since we moved in, I have been searching for the most economical way to work with the space in my office to be as efficient as possible and to not be overwhelmed by clutter all of the time. While I would love to Elfa out the the whole place, that’s just not affordable. Even the kitchen cabinets and stuff I checked out at home improvement stores just wasn’t in our budget. The most affordable thing I found to use in the studio, which is also really heavy duty and durable, as well as pretty flexible, are the cool chrome shelving units we found at Sam’s. We had used them in the kitchen when we had no pantry and then they were moved down to the studio when we updated the kitchen.

In the past month or so, I came up with a new layout. I felt kind of bad because Tim and I spent Independence Day weekend moving stuff around and I was going to make him work again, but of course, he just wants to make me happy. How awesome is he? Anyway, the difference between this office move and the last is that I am really organizing all of my stuff. Not just shoving stuff around, but going through every drawer, box and bin to see what I really have. I have found all kinds of amazing things I’ve forgotten about. And oh man, you would not believe the paper stash!!

So here’s how it went:

Day 1: Tim and I assessed the plan and decided in what order everything was going to move and what we had to do to make that happen. You see, the idea of moving everything out and starting from scratch is way too much for me, so we decided to move things a bit at a time…a desk here, a file cabinet there, stacking things and shoving things out of the way for each phase of the move. I put away as much loose stuff as I could and began shoving everything out of the way.  We moved the desks and set up one of the shelving units to hold all of the electronic equipment. We also moved Tim’s computer downstairs so we could free up space in the family room.

The morning of Day 2, I took these photos:

day 2 – everything shoved to one side of the room	Day 2 – closeup of shoved stuff

Day 2: Tim and I kept moving things and we built the new shelving unit so it would be two 3-shelf units. We also broke apart one of the units that was already in the room and lined them all up along the wall underneath the built-in bookshelves. We also moved my craft table and the big table into the center of the room. I thought it would be cool to set up the little craft table over by the window so I can use that for sewing. My original plan is to make the worktable free of anything other than what I’m actually working on. I also emptied all of the iris carts (except for 2) and now I am the proud owner of many bankers boxes with orange sticky notes on them that say “sort”.

Day 3: I was really tired and only spent an hour or two arranging things and doing light sorting.

Day 4: Today, I spent all day again and got everything off the floor, into boxes for later sorting or placed in their final (or semi-final) homes. I can see where a few things are going to get moved, but not until I’m completely done sorting and know what I have. So now I’m making lists of the stuff I need to sort (rubber stamps, magazines, the closet, the boxes that say “sort”…) and I’m planning on tackling one item a week until it’s all done. I’m really excited!

Final – office side	Final – center of room — worktables
Final – studio side of room – taken from window end	Final – view of room from window end

So that’s what I did on my “break”. I’m really pooped, but very satisfied with my progress.

Plans for 2009 include:

• Finishing UFOs — I found two shelves’ worth during the reorg!
• Learning to play
• Working on my heart’s desire stuff and
• Figuring out who I am as an artist and where I want to go with it.

I’m not going to join swaps willy nilly and I’m not committing to anything that doesn’t help me in some way toward my goals.

Happy New Year, everyone!