wreck this journal week 1

As I type this, I am sitting on my journal. I received this book for Christmas and have done a few of the prompts in it since then, but when I heard Jamie Ridler was leading a Wreck This Journal group, I knew it was a sign that I needed to get more invested in this book. So I am. Only problem is, I keep forgetting to do stuff. ha!

Be Brave
Be Brave

Last weekend, I did do some doodling in one of the pages. Easy enough. Stuff I do every day in other books. Not a big deal. I made a sign for myself.

But last night I tried to do something more daring. There is a black page that says “Lose this page. (Throw it out.) Accept the loss.” I ignored it for a while and looked for another page to work on. Then I went back and tore out the page and crumpled it up. Then I sat the wadded up ball of paper aside and freaked out a little. And I know exactly why.

I love recording things. I love complete archives and histories of events. I want to leave behind stuff that doesn’t make people wonder about Tracey. “Why did grandma tear a page out of this book?” one kid might wonder.

Lose this page
Lose this page

And here’s the other thing. We had barely any money growing up. I learned the value of a dollar very early on. I also learned that if I leave my stuff lying around, my little brothers would destroy it and then it would be gone and there would be no more because there was no money to buy more. So I’m very protective of my stuff.

And that’s why throwing away this page is so hard.

But I’ve done more difficult stuff in the last week. I’ve gone out of my comfort zone at least twice and both times were very rewarding. Also, things aren’t as scarce now as they were when I was nine.  So when I post this entry, I will throw away this wadded up page (in the dumpster outside!) and move on with my day.

16 thoughts on “wreck this journal week 1”

  1. That sign you made is awesome! The lettering is gorgeous, to go along with the sentiment, too. I saw that “make a sign” page in the book, and I take things so literally I could only think of traffic signs! But now I’ll take another look at it with a more open mind (I hope).

    1. Thank you Victoria! I appreciate your comment especially because I never think my lettering is “good enough” — I’m glad I could help you as you helped me!

  2. Isn’t it amazing how this book brings out the past in us? Our habits and where they come from and why. I’m not sure if that was the intent of Keri Smith or if she was just having a lark, whatever – it’s been a pretty valuable lesson to me in discovering just how anal I am.

  3. It’s amazing the stuff that comes up through working with this journal isn’t it? Good for your for moving through the discomfort!

    1. it really is, Leah. I certainly didn’t think this was going to be so much work, but I’m glad I’m doing it.

  4. Good Job!! I’m a little like that – wanting to leave behind complete things. I haven’t torn out that page yet. Good for you for learning a bit about what makes you tick.

    1. Joanne, it’s super uncomfortable, but staying in the comfort zone wasn’t doing me any favors, either, you know?

  5. It’s amazing the things that are showing up as we embrace the wreckage. Congratulations on finding the courage to step outside your comfort zone!

  6. I too left this page alone for a while. Letting go is hard, this is probably one of the most important pages in this book. I just got home from the beach where I ditched mine in a trash can. I had to sit on the bench there for a while and “accept the loss”. Congrats on your artistic acheivements – both with and without the journal. 🙂

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